Today I pictured myself as a little girl walking by the wooden house. I wanted to revisit my past and see the beauty of it one more time. As I glanced in the doorway I could see Mrs. Bell sitting in her favorite chair as the smell of fried chicken seeped through the window tickling my nose; her smile and laughter made me pause and reflect. As her gray hairs glistened her smile was radiant she looked so happy. As I grabbed her hand death forbid me to bring her along.
As I blinked my eyes I was no longer in the past but the present. The sunlight had awoken me out of a deep trance, but as I looked beside me there stood the wooden house. The house was no longer full of life, but abandoned, the door was no longer there and the house was mangled. I could no longer hear the laughter or smell the fried chicken but I felt a breeze of loneliness and it longed to live on.
Death visited me not intentional, but unintentional. I was dreaming, seeing myself at a graveyard when the death angel walked up; “you’re not Leon, you don’t look like Leon I made a mistake.” As the angel began to walk away I couldn’t believe what I had just witnessed and even though I was asleep I felt conscious enough to know I had seen something that people don’t live to talk about. I woke up, shook off this unusual dream and got ready for church. As I sat in church the Pastor came to the podium and said “I was just informed that Leon died this morning.” As I got out of my seat and stumbled out the door recalling my dream I began to shake knowing that the death angel had stopped by. I was flabbergasted and at the same time intrigued. I wanted to know more, I wanted to see more. Death knew me personally and I wanted to talk to him again, I felt an urgency. It would be years before I would see or feel the presence of death again and this time it was more real than ever before. In 2017 my daughter lay fighting for her life after a bout with sepsis, I can recall anointing her day and night with prayer oil, calling on Jesus! I even anointed the room she slept in asking the angels of life to protect her. In her room I could feel the presence of war, a fight for life was going on, but the living angels prevailed and my daughter lived! It was miraculous because the doctors had wrote her off, they couldn’t explain how she lived because she was at the brink of death. I shared my story hoping that this testimony has made you aware that there are spiritual presences walking amongst us that we can’t see with the natural eye, but we have to pray continuously asking God to shield and protect us.
They say you’re damamged goods, no good to no one else. They say you’re worthless, no value at all. They say you’re tarnished, your luster is gone.
They’ve torn you down and made you feel life is not worth living. You decide to take your life, suicide is an easy way out, no one will miss you, you say. Who wants to be worthless, who wants to be tarnished, who wants to be damaged goods. You’re better off dead, you say.
Worthless but still living, tarnished but still living, damaged but still living.
Don’t do it, don’t take your life, you were born to live! We all face trials, we all face obstacles, we are all valuable, we can be restored.
I hate death, but who in their right mind loves death; losing a love one is heart wrenching and it amazes me when I see the strength one has when burying a loved one. Death has no age restrictions, death doesn’t care how beautiful you are and death doesn’t care if you’re rich or poor. Tell your loved ones how much you love them while you can, because life is short. I lost my grandfather in 1991 and my bestie in 1998; I still mourn for them both and I often wonder why am I here and their gone. What did I do so special that my life was spared? To my grandad and my best friend I miss you both and I will continue to keep your memory alive.
Rest In Peace
On yesterday I went to the store and as I was shopping I looked for the expiration date on my food to make sure nothing was outdated, then it popped in my head we too have an expiration date. Many prepare by getting an Life Insurance Policy or setting a Last Will and Testament in place; but is that preparing you or your family?
I never think about how soon my expiration date maybe but it’s inevitable because it’s apart of life. With the recent death of celebrities Prince, David Bowie, Alan Thicke, and so many more celebrities everyone is starting to take notice that no one is invincible when it comes to death no matter how rich you are. You can’t buy a cure and you can’t purchase more days. Life is short and we must live it to the fullest. Make an impact on someone’s life, give without looking for something in return, love with no barriers.