I woke up this morning a little down in my spirit because I felt that my books weren’t receiving the attention they so desperately need and then I strolled on social media and came across a Tyler Video that talked about “Watering Your Seed.” Oh how that video changed my outlook on my situation, you see I’m so busy focusing on the now I can’t see my future. No matter who tries to dig up my seed, I must keep it watered. You see without water, plants don’t grow and branches don’t sprout leaves.
Tyler talked about his uphill journey and how he spent countless money trying to get his plays out to the mainstream audience until eventually he got a breakthrough and God opened doors for him, meaning everyone’s success don’t happen overnight but that’s not a sign for you to give up but keep pushing forward! When God gives you a gift/talent you use it don’t plant it and forget about it but water it so it can grow.
That video also made me think of the illustration in the Bible, Matthew 25:14-30 if God gives you one TALENT you use it, exercise your gift because God will make room for it Proverbs 18:16. For those who just planted a seed keep watering it, for those who seeds are starting to sprout keep watering it, for those who have branches keep watering it, for those who have leaves keep watering it and for those who have a tree keep watering it. When you keep God first your TALENT will make room for you!!
“That’s just my baby daddy” she said. Women we have to do better when it comes to addressing the father/fathers of our children. I understand he left (walked out) and I understand he may do something today and tomorrow he does nothing, but he is still that child’s father. As a woman I have raised two girls on my own but I never spoke a bad word about their dad’s or addressed them as a “BABY DADDY”. What you may or may not realize the hate you harbor towards their father grows up in that child as well. He wasn’t a baby daddy when you were in love so he shouldn’t be a baby daddy when you fell out of love.
When that child grows up they will see who was there for them, but in the mean time as a mother you be there for your child regardless and be supportive. Don’t you dare take out your frustrations on that child because that man doesn’t want to be with you, but be in his child’s life IT’S NOT FAIR TO THE CHILD. Stop with this “I’m the momma and the daddy foolishness” if God intended you to have two roles then he wouldn’t have created Adam and Eve.
Bottom line don’t hold on to hate let it go for the child’s sake and your peace of mind, if he comes around be cordial and if he doesn’t that’s fine too because God will take care of you and your child, I’m a witness.
I walk into a quiet atmosphere greeted by a cheerful hostess, she escorts me to a cozy booth and I have a seat. It’s around 11:30 am and lunch has just begun, I browse through the menu just to appease onlookers but I came through the door knowing what I wanted. I’m at my favorite place, different location, but my favorite place!!
Another sit down at Red Lobster; what did I do so good to enjoy such a delectable meal? Vanessa is my waitress and she is the sweetest; I order the peppercorn steak well done with grilled shrimp accompanied by a corn on the cob and a baked potato topped with sour cream, butter, and shredded cheese. By the way let me get a side of shrimp pasta; I am a celebrating my first paperback release on Amazon, let’s toast with my sprite soda.
Small Town Gossip
Oh no!! They are out of corn on the cob 😲, no worries double the potato please. How can you run out of corn, did you not inventory your food supply ?
The salad comes first, it’s been pre-made and stuck in the fridge just in case they have a rush crowd, it has no crunch and the croutons taste stale, BUMMER.
I sit there in a daze waiting on the main course and it comes out steaming hot. I don’t know where to start so I began with the potato it’s delicious, I sample the pasta it’s delicious, let me try a shrimp, it’s delicious, I cut into my steak it’s MEDIUM RARE……..
I’m sorry says Vanessa I will have them make you another one.
Can I have a to go box, thanks you were an excellent waitress and you handled things perfectly.
Walks out of restaurant with to go bags in hand, thinking they fixed their mistake they get an A+ in my books.
Have you ever loved someone that didn’t love you back? It hurt so bad and the feelings you felt wouldn’t go away no matter how many tears you cried.
Have you ever loved someone that didn’t love you back? You didn’t think you could go on; you felt useless, your love was not wanted.
Have you ever loved someone that didn’t love you back? You hated the one who hurt you, you made a vow to hurt someone so they could feel your pain.
Have you ever loved someone that didn’t love you back? You wanted the feeling of loneliness to leave, you tried to snap out of it but it lingered.
Have you ever loved someone that didn’t love you back? You looked in the mirror time and time again giving yourself a pep talk “there’s more fish in the sea.” You said it but you didn’t believe it.
Have you ever loved someone that didn’t love you back? You felt guilty that the love you gave was not returned.
We have all loved someone that didn’t love us back, we have all cried tears of sadness for someone who wasn’t worth our tears, we have all given up on love.
We gave up on love but love never gave up on us. Love will find you no matter your address it will knock on your heart one day and never leave. Love will return into your heart, and say “I still love you.”
Every morning when I open my eyes I ask God to bless me with riches and every night I close my eyes I ask God to bless me with riches. I am at a point in my life that I am tired of living paycheck to paycheck and I just want to be rich! I don’t want the kind of richness that you don’t have any privacy like celebrities, I want the kind of richness that after all my bills are paid I can go to dinner, take my kids to the movies, or an amusement park and not worry about the ticket price, the food, or lodging.
One day last year I sat down with a piece of paper and brainstormed. What kind of talent could I bring to the table that would make me rich and successful? Last year I started this blog and a YouTube channel, and this year I became an author on Amazon. I knew I wouldn’t make a lot of profit doing this, but to get my name out there would be very beneficial. I have convinced myself that you never know who is watching you so keep putting your best foot forward, treat everyone with kindness because a good name goes further than a tank of gas, and don’t be discouraged by a closed door, keep knocking until someone opens the door and lets you in.
I’m never going to give up on my dreams of being rich, I want a better life for me and my family. I have what it takes to be successful, I have what it takes to be successful and I won’t stop. My favorite cartoon growing up was Pinky and the Brain. I loved the end of each show because it would end like this:
Pinky: Gee, Brain, what do you want to do tonight?
Brain: The same thing we do every night, Pinky – try to take over the world!
You see Brain was persistence day in and day out he never gave up and that’s how you have to be in life if you really want something. My mom would always say “Money doesn’t grow on trees anything worth having is worth working for.” This is one wives tale that I truly believe in, thanks mom….xoxo!
You took my innocence, you took my innocence, screaming you took my innocence you coward! I didn’t ask for your hands to touch my skin, I didn’t ask for your hands to touch my skin! No one deserves to be raped, no one deserves to be raped, no one! For years I lived in a mental prison blaming myself for something you did afraid to tell anyone so ashamed. I remember being in relationships but not feeling loved and not being able to love back. Always pushing those who truly loved me away ending up alone. I created a brick wall, this was my way of not allowing anyone to hurt me like you hurt me.
I didn’t want to date anyone that reminded me of you so I dated outside my race. For years I sheltered my children afraid for them, knowing someone out there could do to them what you did to me. Yes I sheltered my children, sometimes smothering them, but this was my way of keeping them safe. I could never forgive myself if something like this happened to my children . As years passed I found solace in writing, I was able to express on paper what I couldn’t speak about, it helped me to overcome what you did to me so many years ago. I broke out of the mental prison I was in by forgiving you. I overcame your hold, I overcame the guilt I felt for years, I was able to love again, I was able to do all the things you thought I couldn’t do. I realized I was not to blame, I was never guilty of your actions.
I wrote this blog with tears falling from my eyes because I felt like I was reliving that moment again, but this time with no sadness but joy because I survived to tell my story hoping it helps someone else who has went through abuse. Please, please, please, realize as a victim you are not to blame so never feel guilty! When you forgive you release the hold that individual has over your life. My favorite poem is “I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings” by Maya Angelou. This poem helped me tremendously I became victorious and didn’t let the circumstances around me take control of my life. I am so thankful that I am free from his hold, no longer bound by his actions, I AM FREE!!
I am happy to say that I have a written my first book titled “My Natural Hair Journey.” I wanted to share the stages that I went through as a natural and hopefully it will inspire those who feel like giving up and returning back to the creamy crack to keep pressing. Being natural is not easy but it’s definitely worth it. Below is an excerpt from my book.
Please click on the link and purchase “My Natural Hair Journey for $3.00 USD, I promise you won’t be disappointed. I would love for you to also leave a review, xoxo 😘.
My Natural Hair Journey
When I look into my son’s eyes I am reminded daily that God blessed me with a MIRACLE. It’s hard to fathom that this is the same little boy that the doctors said would not make it.
The only thing a mother truly wants is for her child to be healthy, a mother will give her own life so her child may have the opportunity to LIVE!
I will never forget that moment when they took my son after birth to run tests , needless to say their tests would be my TESTIMONY.
“Negative results how could this be, you’re lucky” they said, but I replied BLESSED.
My son is a happy, energetic, and smart little boy who keeps me on my toes, I can’t imagine my LIFE without him.
Not once did I lose my FAITH in God, I prayed day in and day out. I share my story because someone reading this may be going through a hard pregnancy and feel like giving up based on what the doctors have said, please don’t give up.
Doctors tell you what they see and diagnose cases on their studies, but if you have faith and PRAY without ceasing I’m a witness that miracles happen.
My son is now seven and thinks he’s my bodyguard, LOL. To think that the little boy that I once carried in my womb, rocked on my lap, carried on my shoulder, now stands beside me as a little fellow whose smile melts my HEART everyday ❤.
Growing up as a young child I never knew who my dad was, it was only when I got older that I found out; by this time it was too late because I didn’t need him or want him in my life. “Your mom didn’t want me in your life” he said. “Your mom kept you away from you” he said. A bunch of excuses that never told the truth only uncovered secrets. I faulted my mom because she kept him away and I faulted him because he stayed away.
Why wait until you’re on your death bed to want to meet me, were you trying to get your soul right before you spent eternity in hell? His family didn’t know I existed and I didn’t know they existed. After I found out who he was I visited him because even though I hated what he did that little girl inside of me missed her daddy. Why was I spending time with someone who didn’t care if I lived or died? I remember visiting him one day and asking for five dollars to get gas to be told ” I don’t have it!” I was so hurt!!
This dead beat never provided me with food, clothes, or shelter when I was young and to make matters worse he couldn’t even give the daughter he never did anything for five dollars! A couple years later the man I knew as my dad died. I wasn’t sad nor did I shed a tear. I was told that I wouldn’t be allowed to attend the funeral because his oldest daughter didn’t want me there, I guess he told my half-sisters about me before he died.
I didn’t ponder on his death I kept living. I am glad to say I didn’t let my past define my future. Any man that doesn’t make an effort to be in their child’s life is a sorry excuse for a man. As a child never feel guilty because you didn’t do anything wrong, you were born with a purpose and whoever is not involved in your life is missing out on the best kept secret.
Growing up in a black home the most important day of the week is Soul Food Sunday! On Soul Food Sunday you go to church praise the Lord and come home to a table overflowing with Soul Food; fried chicken, cabbage, lima beans, collard greens, smothered porkchops, fried okra, candy yams, homemade macaroni and cheese, corn bread, fried ribs, yellow rice, white rice, catfish, chitterlings, ham, banana pudding, red velvet cake, and sweet potato pies.
Your mouth is watering but you can’t dig in until the designated person prays over the food which is the longest prayer when you’re hungry. That aroma is going up your nose and your stomach begins to growl louder and louder. When the prayer is complete everyone digs in.
You sit to the table enjoying big momma’s feast as she ask “baby you want some dessert?” You’re so stuffed but you don’t won’t to turn down the dessert because you’re just that greedy. Big momma goes into the kitchen and comes out with dessert.
You see the older men loosen their belts and the older ladies ask to be excused to go take off their stockings to make room for that sweet potato pie, red velvet cake, banana pudding, and german chocolate cake. Big momma just smiles because she knows she put her foot in that meal.
After the feast all the adults males go into the living room to catch the rest of the football game, the ladies help big momma in the kitchen cleaning up, and the kids go outside to play. It’s been a successful Soul Food Sunday until we all meet again at big mommas house.