Growing up my grandfather would always tell me that a young girl should value her name. I didn’t understand it then because my grandfather would always talk in riddles. As I got older I began to understand why it was so important to value your name. As young women we are often so hasty to find love, we often rely on our clothing to attract men instead of our intellect.
Maybe it’s possible for you to find love at the age of 16, but at that age I was still trying to find myself. You may think you’ve found the right one but then it happens y’all break up and then it’s another and another and another. You keep coming up empty and by this time your name has become the talk of town. “That Girl is loose,” they say.
Wow! This is what my grandfather meant when he said value your name. A man’s name is seldom exposed to so much gossip but a woman’s name seems to be fair game.
I am grateful that my grandfather talked in riddles and thought it not robbery to educate me about life. I learned that a good name and reputation is all you have so hold on to it and don’t let go.
Today I pictured myself as a little girl walking by the wooden house. I wanted to revisit my past and see the beauty of it one more time. As I glanced in the doorway I could see Mrs. Bell sitting in her favorite chair as the smell of fried chicken seeped through the window tickling my nose; her smile and laughter made me pause and reflect. As her gray hairs glistened her smile was radiant she looked so happy. As I grabbed her hand death forbid me to bring her along.
As I blinked my eyes I was no longer in the past but the present. The sunlight had awoken me out of a deep trance, but as I looked beside me there stood the wooden house. The house was no longer full of life, but abandoned, the door was no longer there and the house was mangled. I could no longer hear the laughter or smell the fried chicken but I felt a breeze of loneliness and it longed to live on.
I remember praying for a husband, I was very specific in my prayer request of what type of husband I wanted God to send me. Days turned into weeks, weeks turned into months, and months turned into years. I was a single mother with two girls and had given up on settling down. I remember praying asking how long… his response love me more, seek me more, and he would give me the desires of my heart.
Staying in a small town I thought this was impossible. Then it happened, in 2008 I met my husband because of a nail in my tire. I tell the story often because I had made up my mind that I would never meet someone. I felt like Sarah when the angel of the Lord told her she would have a child in her old age and she laughed.
I was very impatient, I wanted God to answer my prayers right then but his timing was not mine. Lord knows I wasn’t ready. I could cook and take care of my home but I wasn’t mentally or spiritually ready to settle down.
When I first laid eyes on my husband I didn’t know he would be the one, but he said it on day one that I would be his wife. I laughed at him, I could recall saying “you don’t even know me!”
Fast forward to tomorrow and we will be celebrating our 9th Wedding Anniversary!! I had to share my story to let someone who is seeking a husband or wife to keep trusting God and wait until he sends you the right one. Continue to seek the Lord as he prepares you for your spouse.
How many of you have turned the other cheek when someone has wronged you? For some that can be a hard pill to swallow (metaphorically) but I have learned to refrain from retaliating against those who have insulted or attacked me.
Some are reading this and shaking their head, mumbling that they are not going to turn the other cheek but set it off. Please tell me what will setting it off do? You can’t control another’s actions but you can control your own.
Some people live to make others miserable, they pick and pick wanting you to lash out at them but you must be the better person.
“When they go low, we go high.”
– Michelle Obama
Turning the other cheek is not meaning to fight in the natural sense but spiritually it means to show love to those who continue to do you wrong.
Matthew 5:39 King James Version (KJV)
39 But I say unto you, That ye resist not evil: but whosoever shall smite thee on thy right cheek, turn to him the other also.
Took my son to the doctor this morning, the doctors report wasn’t the best but I was still thanking God that we were heading home and not to a hospital. When I got closer to home I had an urgency to feel my pockets and to my surprise my license was gone, LOST!
I panicked and pulled over to call the doctors office and was told that no one had found it. I attempted to call the place where we had stopped for breakfast but the phone line was busy so I decided to call the drivers license office and see how much a duplicate would be and headed that way.
Got there and was happy to be number 25 as they were on 22 so my wait wouldn’t be long, as I sat there an urgency came upon me to call the breakfast location again and this time the phone began to ring. Someone had found my license in the parking lot and turned it in, I was so happy!!
I didn’t hesitate to drive the hour and a half distance again to reclaim something that I had lost but was now found.
As I turned into my yard I could only think of the Parable of the Lost Coin. The way I rejoiced over my license is how God and his angels rejoices over one person giving their life to Christ.
8 Either what woman having ten pieces of silver, if she lose one piece, doth not light a candle, and sweep the house, and seek diligently till she find it?
9 And when she hath found it, she calleth her friends and her neighbours together, saying, Rejoice with me; for I have found the piece which I had lost.
10 Likewise, I say unto you, there is joy in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner that repenteth.
Death visited me not intentional, but unintentional. I was dreaming, seeing myself at a graveyard when the death angel walked up; “you’re not Leon, you don’t look like Leon I made a mistake.” As the angel began to walk away I couldn’t believe what I had just witnessed and even though I was asleep I felt conscious enough to know I had seen something that people don’t live to talk about. I woke up, shook off this unusual dream and got ready for church. As I sat in church the Pastor came to the podium and said “I was just informed that Leon died this morning.” As I got out of my seat and stumbled out the door recalling my dream I began to shake knowing that the death angel had stopped by. I was flabbergasted and at the same time intrigued. I wanted to know more, I wanted to see more. Death knew me personally and I wanted to talk to him again, I felt an urgency. It would be years before I would see or feel the presence of death again and this time it was more real than ever before. In 2017 my daughter lay fighting for her life after a bout with sepsis, I can recall anointing her day and night with prayer oil, calling on Jesus! I even anointed the room she slept in asking the angels of life to protect her. In her room I could feel the presence of war, a fight for life was going on, but the living angels prevailed and my daughter lived! It was miraculous because the doctors had wrote her off, they couldn’t explain how she lived because she was at the brink of death. I shared my story hoping that this testimony has made you aware that there are spiritual presences walking amongst us that we can’t see with the natural eye, but we have to pray continuously asking God to shield and protect us.
Forget those people who say you’re never happy, or always complaining. Truth be told you are happy, just not with them. Some people can drain your spirit and make you wish that you never knew them. Being alone is not such a bad thing, that moment when you can live in complete silence and not be obligated is a gift to yourself. It bothers me when I hear people say “I need someone,” the only person you need at that moment is you.
Are you falling in love with being with a person or the title that accompanies the relationship? Before you answer that, think hard the next time you ponder settling.
You gave me your last name when my father wouldn’t.
You encouraged me to write when I told you I couldn’t.
You purchased materials that you said I would need.
You saw a talent in me that I couldn’t see.
You taught me to believe in my dreams.
And I am forever grateful that you believed in me
Dedicating all my books in your honor for without you I would be no author.
Waking up some mornings I feel as though it’s just me against the world. Everything that is supposed to go right goes wrong. That vicious cycle of life deals you a hard blow and no one, I mean no one comes to your rescue, instead of giving you a band-aid for your wound they pour salt on it. It took me awhile to realize that everyone that smiles in your face doesn’t have your best interest at heart.
It’s always the ones that you have known the longest that develops that deadly disease of jealousy and becomes your biggest hater instead of your biggest fan. If it’s me against the world so be it. I will stand alone, but when I become famous please no crowding.
I wasn’t looking for a relationship and didn’t care that you fixed my tire, it was your job and no I wasn’t tipping you.
As I walked away I looked back at you thinking I hope I never see you again.
Two months later another nail.
Denying your offers, not interested.
You’re cute, but not all that, you walk on your tip-toes for goodness sake.
I gave in and went on a date with you and one year later we were married.
I wasn’t looking for love, but I fell in love with you and I thank God everyday for that nail that sealed the deal.