I haven’t sold a lot of books, been discouraged along the way, but my faith never wavered because being an author is my destiny! Learning to never give up on my dreams even when others don’t support me because everyone can’t see my vision.
You will find out who is truly there for you when you start to grow, it should be something inside of you that wants better, something inside of you that won’t to settle, a drive, a push….
For me I am pushing with all my might to be successful and success doesn’t come easy, but if you are determined you can make it!! Learning to keep pushing because at the end of that long bumpy road there is a reward.
#dreams #vision #amazon #author
🎼 Have you ever loved somebody so much it makes you cry, have you ever needed something so bad you can’t sleep at night – Brandy
As a young woman growing up in the 90’s you would take songs that were relatable to the situations in your life and make them your anthem. I remember singing this song until I would fall asleep at night thinking I couldn’t go on without that special someone. I would blast my walkman with my headphones glued to my ears singing so loudly wishing he could hear me, wishing he could hear the hurt in my voice.
I truly thought I was hurt by him not loving me, I truly thought I couldn’t go on, but as I grew older I realized the hurt that I felt didn’t come from him not loving me, but from me not loving myself. The love we shared was superficial; puppy love, crush love.
One night my anthem was blasting and then I uttered “have you ever needed something so bad” and then tears began to flow; I had sung that particular verse several times relating it to that lost love that was once in my life, but this time I related it to my father who had abandoned me at birth, I needed and wanted a relationship with him so badly.
At that particular moment in time an overwhelming feeling came upon me and then it hit me like a ton of bricks, all of those years without him, trying to fill a void of not having him in my life with a boy that was only capable of loving the first woman he had ever known, his mother. I was actually using him, he was using me, we were using each other. We both needed something from one another; affection which consisted of short kisses on the lip that made you get butterflies in your stomach, conversations that would last on the phone until our momma made us hang up. It didn’t make it right, but it was right in our eyes.
Now that I know what love truly is I am thankful to have it in my life, it’s not superficial but real. Wondering did my dad ever love me, wondering did he ever have real love for my mom, just wondering. Through all my heartaches I have learned that in order to love anyone, you must first fall in love with yourself and be true to the feelings in your heart; hopefully, just hopefully my dad loved himself enough to love me.
I am an author and I am trying to get the word out about my material which is not an easy task. Sometimes you have to put yourself out there to catch that big break you’ve been waiting on. I’m winning when I’m losing because I’m determined. My passion is writing and even when people shoot me down I keep pushing. I know one day my books will get out there, I just know it!! Please follow me on Amazon to see my latest book releases.
#amazonauthor #amazonkindle #amazonpaperback #wordpressblogger #sheknewtoomuch #smalltowngossip
I can remember sitting in English class and my seventh grade teacher Dr. Crowell would give us writing assignments. I would sit there half of the period twiddling my thumbs because I didn’t know what to write about. One day as he was walking around the class he came and stood by my desk and said “writing is easy if you apply yourself, but the first thing you must do is brainstorm.” He then went to the board and start drawing these little circles that he would write words in and draw a line connecting to another circle. “This will help you become a great writer,” he said. That one lesson stuck with me and has helped me to channel my thoughts on paper before I even start writing a book. Dr. Crowell left this world sometime ago, but his teachings were instilled in me. I’m proud to say through brainstorming I was able to release “She Knew Too Much” on Amazon and it’s my second paperback release. To view my books click on the link below.
Living in a small town you can expect everyone to know your mother, father, grandmother, grandfather, auntie, uncle, cousins; you get the picture, LOL. They not only know your family but your business as well. They will gossip about you and tell you to your face what they said. If you weren’t raised in that particular small town you stick out like a sore thumb and you get the evil eye when you try to smile and ease the stares. Small towns don’t want outsiders coming in they are only content with being around the people that they know and grew up with. Who cares if they have only one stoplight and no grocery store they rather travel two hours to get a decent meal and buy two weeks worth of groceries. I live in a small town and I wouldn’t change my upbringing for anything in this world , it made me more humble and appreciative especially when I moved to the city and no one spoke or held the door open; if you were coming they let it slam in your face 😱. It only made sense that my first book would be titled “Small Town Gossip.” Not to toot my own horn, but I’m proud of myself because I did something that some said I couldn’t. If you have a dream don’t stop dreaming, don’t stop doing, keep pushing forward, one no will someday equal a hundred yesssssss! If you want to know what it’s like to live in a small town, please check out my first paperback on Amazon, LINK BELOW.
Small Town Gossip
I have always been an avid reader and my love for books is endless, especially mysteries. I can recall going to Barnes and Noble just browsing the aisles looking for a book that would catch my eye, but never in a million years did I ever foresee myself as a book reviewer. I recently did my first book review on Blogging for Books and Goodreads. I usually try to read two books at a time, LOL. I usually read my Kindle in the morning, and my hard copy book at night, no better feeling than being cuddled in the bed with a good book before you go to sleep. If you’re avid reader let’s connect on Goodreads.
“The Heirs” – book review below.
The beginning of the book starts off intense, it reels you in by talking about Rupert Falkes fight with cancer and his willingness to live. You are introduced to his wife and children thinking this is the perfect family. Rupert came from nothing and became a millionaire in his own rights, his wife had a great upbringing but didn’t aquire love until she met Rupert. The Falkes seem like your typical family, married with 5 boys and living the American dream until Rupert Falkes dies and the truth is revealed. I loved the book, not what I expected which was excellent. I received this book courtesy of Blogging for Books.
This morning as I got dressed for church I began to reflect on my 44 years of life on this earth. Nothing that I have done or did allowed me to wake up this morning but God’s grace and mercy. Out of all the mornings, why did I reflect today? I could recall being shot at, being raped, colliding with a semi-truck but with each recollection I saw God holding my hand. You may think why would God be there during the hard times and not help you, he did help me he gave me strength to endure.
God has a purpose and plan for my life, I am a living testimony; by me telling the goodness of Jesus someone who may feel like they don’t have a reason to exist my testimony may give them hope. Before throwing in the towel of failure, guilt, and shame just know we are all living testimonies and regardless of what we go through in life there is someone out there just like us who went through but came out alright. Our ability to live is within, deep down inside we have an inner strength that we didn’t think we had; we are conquerors, we are victorious, we are LIVING TESTIMONIES.