Did she just call my fro nappy? Wow I’m shocked that a black sista would stoop so low to criticize a texture that she was born with and is probably covering up with a weave or has been altered with a perm. She said “I wouldn’t be caught dead with a fro, especially a nappy fro like hers!” I stood silent still trying to take it all in then I walked away.
I was not going to lower my standards by responding to her ignorance . I’ve learned that every action doesn’t deserve a reaction so I walked away with my head held high and my Afro puffed out proud to be rocking a, as she called it “NAPPY FRO!”
I remember dropping her off wondering would I ever see her again. As she got out of my station wagon and glanced toward the kitchen window where the machete sat placed at an angle I could see the fear in her eyes; I begged her to get back in the car, but she said she would be fine and walked away. I was so worried but what could I do she didn’t want my help. Earlier in the day my sweet friend Emma had confided in me that she was in an abusive relationship, she said her husband beat her and threatened that if she tried to leave he would cut her up with the machete in the kitchen window.
I was fresh out of high school attending a vocational school three towns over in Belle Glade, FL pursuing a license in Cosmetology. I was clueless about abuse because I had not been exposed to it or knew of anyone being abused. I don’t know why she told me but she did.
One morning as I stopped by to pick up Emma I could hear her husband screaming at her, I couldn’t make out the words but I knew it was bad. I didn’t know whether to get out of the car and knock on the door or drive off. After contemplating what to do for about five minutes I got out of my car, I was so nervous my knees were knocking.
I knocked on the door really hard for about five minutes. Finally Emma came out of the house she looked as though she had been crying. I offered to take her to a police station but she refused. I asked if she had family she could go stay with she said no. The rest of the ride to school was quiet. The next morning I received a call from Emma she said that she would no longer be attending school; I kept stopping by but she didn’t answer the door, I called but her number was no longer in service. Everyday I would ride by and one day I noticed a for rent sign in the window where the machete once sat, Emma had moved. I haven’t seen Emma since but I know there are some Emma’s out there. I always wondered why she stayed and why her husband was abusive. Did Emma see her mother get abused and did her husband see his father abuse his mother?? No one deserves to be abused whether physically or verbally, LOVE doesn’t HURT!!
You thought the grass was greener on the other side so you sacrificed your marriage and family only to get what you wanted and lose what you had.
Why would you throw away 18 years of marriage and five kids for an extramarital affair? Now you want to go back home; wishing for what you had but it’s gone. That extramarital affair cost you your family when you walked out of their lives. The sad part is you don’t think you did anything wrong and that you’re the victim.
Your husband has filed for divorce and your kids are blaming you for tearing the family apart, all because you got what you wanted and lost what you had. I’m not sad for you but for them; you are not the victim they are. I hope you’re happy with the weeds you plucked because the grass wasn’t greener on the other side.
I love cooking with my son, I never want my son to depend on anyone to cook for him. When he was much smaller he asked could he help me in the kitchen and I couldn’t have been more happier. I never want to force my kids to do something they don’t have a love for because I feel when their forced they resent what they are doing.
He is very hands on it’s amazing how he grew up on me he went from a chair at the stove to standing there without one. We cook everything from soup, spaghetti, smothered pork chops you name it!
I think every parent should cook with their child it builds a relationship like no other and they learn. My son honestly think he knows more than me, LOL. We recently did a YouTube video where we made Bacon Wrapped Smokies, click on the link below.
Bacon Wrapped Smokies
He may be the next Marcus Samuelson, Bobby Flay, or Moe Cason!! I love being a parent it’s the greatest job a mother could ever have.
Growing up as a young child I never knew who my dad was, it was only when I got older that I found out; by this time it was too late because I didn’t need him or want him in my life. “Your mom didn’t want me in your life” he said. “Your mom kept you away from you” he said. A bunch of excuses that never told the truth only uncovered secrets. I faulted my mom because she kept him away and I faulted him because he stayed away.
Why wait until you’re on your death bed to want to meet me, were you trying to get your soul right before you spent eternity in hell? His family didn’t know I existed and I didn’t know they existed. After I found out who he was I visited him because even though I hated what he did that little girl inside of me missed her daddy. Why was I spending time with someone who didn’t care if I lived or died? I remember visiting him one day and asking for five dollars to get gas to be told ” I don’t have it!” I was so hurt!!
This dead beat never provided me with food, clothes, or shelter when I was young and to make matters worse he couldn’t even give the daughter he never did anything for five dollars! A couple years later the man I knew as my dad died. I wasn’t sad nor did I shed a tear. I was told that I wouldn’t be allowed to attend the funeral because his oldest daughter didn’t want me there, I guess he told my half-sisters about me before he died.
I didn’t ponder on his death I kept living. I am glad to say I didn’t let my past define my future. Any man that doesn’t make an effort to be in their child’s life is a sorry excuse for a man. As a child never feel guilty because you didn’t do anything wrong, you were born with a purpose and whoever is not involved in your life is missing out on the best kept secret.
Growing up in a black home the most important day of the week is Soul Food Sunday! On Soul Food Sunday you go to church praise the Lord and come home to a table overflowing with Soul Food; fried chicken, cabbage, lima beans, collard greens, smothered porkchops, fried okra, candy yams, homemade macaroni and cheese, corn bread, fried ribs, yellow rice, white rice, catfish, chitterlings, ham, banana pudding, red velvet cake, and sweet potato pies.
Your mouth is watering but you can’t dig in until the designated person prays over the food which is the longest prayer when you’re hungry. That aroma is going up your nose and your stomach begins to growl louder and louder. When the prayer is complete everyone digs in.
You sit to the table enjoying big momma’s feast as she ask “baby you want some dessert?” You’re so stuffed but you don’t won’t to turn down the dessert because you’re just that greedy. Big momma goes into the kitchen and comes out with dessert.
You see the older men loosen their belts and the older ladies ask to be excused to go take off their stockings to make room for that sweet potato pie, red velvet cake, banana pudding, and german chocolate cake. Big momma just smiles because she knows she put her foot in that meal.
After the feast all the adults males go into the living room to catch the rest of the football game, the ladies help big momma in the kitchen cleaning up, and the kids go outside to play. It’s been a successful Soul Food Sunday until we all meet again at big mommas house.
Woke up this morning to 1k views on one of my YouTube videos! I couldn’t be more excited. I started this channel six months ago to share my natural hair journey and to know someone out there is watching what I do makes me overjoyed!!
This has truly gave me inspiration to go on and never quit doing something I love. On one of my blogs (Natural Hair Accessories) I received a sincere comment that truly touched me. Thanks to everyone who has supported me on this journey, xoxo!!