Broken but Mended

You took my innocence, you took my innocence, screaming you took my innocence you coward!  I didn’t ask for your hands to touch my skin, I didn’t ask for your hands to touch my skin!  No one deserves to be raped, no one deserves to be raped, no one! For years I lived in a mental prison blaming myself for something you did afraid to tell anyone so  ashamed. I remember being in relationships but not feeling loved and not being able to love back. Always pushing those who truly loved me away ending up alone. I created a brick wall, this was my way of not allowing anyone to hurt me like you hurt me. 


I didn’t want to date anyone that reminded me of you so I dated outside my race. For years I sheltered my children afraid for them, knowing someone out there could do to them what you did to me. Yes I sheltered my children, sometimes smothering them, but this was my way of keeping them safe. I could never forgive myself if something like this happened to my children . As years passed I found  solace in writing, I was able to express on paper what I couldn’t speak about, it helped me to overcome what you did to me so many years ago. I broke out of the mental prison I was in by forgiving you. I overcame your hold, I overcame the guilt I felt for years, I was able to love again, I was able to do all the things you thought I couldn’t do. I realized  I was not to blame, I was never guilty of your actions.  

I wrote this blog with tears falling from my eyes because I felt like I was reliving that moment again, but this time with no sadness but joy because I survived to tell my story hoping it helps someone else who has went through abuse. Please, please, please, realize as a victim you are not to blame so never feel guilty! When you forgive you release the hold that individual has over your life.  My favorite poem is “I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings” by Maya Angelou. This poem helped me tremendously I became victorious and didn’t let the  circumstances around me take control of my life. I am so thankful that I am free from his hold, no longer bound by his actions, I AM FREE!! 

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Author: Sabrina Gonzalez

#BLOGGER

13 thoughts on “Broken but Mended”

  1. I have no words astonished by the integrity and bravery that you’ve portrayed by writing this and sharing it!! If this story was turned into a book it would surely make the BEST SELLERS list!!! There are so many young girls and women out there that needs this story and testimony that there’s hope and freedom at the end of the tunnel!!!! I’m in tears friend!!!!!! 😍😢😢😢💙💙💙💙💙

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Joshua we all have faced trials in our life but we have to find that inner strength to become victorious! I pray that my story helps someone to realize that they are not alone and to take a stand.

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  2. WOW what a touching blog. I pray you finish this book IT MUST BE PUBLISHED! There are so many others living in fear of this same situation, male and female. You are such a phenomenal, strong woman for sharing this experience. Thank God for your freedom. We give God ALL the honor, glory, and praise for your victory. I love you so much niecie.

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    1. I love you too auntie! I struggled for so long thinking it was my fought but I thank God for giving me a voice to shed light on what some sweep up under the rug!! Thanks for everything you have done and continue to do!!!

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  3. POWERFUL!!. God Bless you for sharing your pain, your heart, your story. Through your story you are blessed to be a blessing…. You are one of God’s angels here on Earth.

    Love you and keep moving forward my sistah.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Javonne you truly have blessed me by being apart of my life, you inspire me daily. Unknowingly you put a burning desire within me to share my story and never give up! Thanks my sistah for always believing in me!!

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  4. Your smart strong mind is nothing short than amazing!
    Thank you for sharing this story and for being brave enough to share with the world.
    You are an inspiration and seeing your blog makes ask… when are you writing a book?
    Truly great and powerful! Thank you

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Wow, you are incredibly brave and strong for writing about your experiences so honestly, and for not letting this person who hurt you from holding you back. You are amazing and you deserve to be treated like gold. Keep writing. Keep speaking. Much love – speak766

    Liked by 1 person

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